just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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