So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
