Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
