FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
