i permit you to call me
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
