dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize