Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Pants are for mortals
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
