Who wears a wallet chain?!
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
