is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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