I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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