I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
