Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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