she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Randomize
