First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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