She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i just google imaged poop.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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