is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
