just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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