adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
