I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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