Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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