69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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