Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
