I swear she didn't look like that last week.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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