what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Randomize
