I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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