All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Randomize
