your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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