Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
