I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
