shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Randomize
