The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
