Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
