Where is the hickey?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
