that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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