we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
