their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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