Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
