I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
