Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
