google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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