How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
