I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
