The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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