dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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