i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Randomize
