So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
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