how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
