playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
