it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
