Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I wish I only lived at night.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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